Now with 50% more [NEWS] 3/31-4/6

[Demontestament]

New news thread is Go!

[Demontestament]

http://www.wftv.com/news/15748647/detail.html

Channel 9 placed a call to the WWE to ask them how the accident could happen. The call was not immediately returned.

Someone ****ed up is my guess. The WWE isn't really knows for their safety precautions when it comes to stuff in the rafters.

[BlackIce, British Commie]

http://www.wftv.com/news/15748647/detail.html



Someone ****ed up is my guess. The WWE isn't really knows for their safety precautions when it comes to stuff in the rafters.

Who gives a **** about the fans anyway?

[Thefremen]

http://www.wftv.com/news/15748647/detail.html



Someone ****ed up is my guess. The WWE isn't really knows for their safety precautions when it comes to stuff in the rafters.

"Can you smell what the Rock is cooking?"

*sniff* "Smells like human flesh!"

[Demontestament]

(CNN) – Hillary Clinton appears to have lost a high-profile backer to rival Barack Obama.

Rapper 50 Cent, who told Time magazine last September he was supporting the New York senator's White House bid, now says he has decided to shift his allegiance to Obama.

The multi-platinum star, born Curtis Jackson, told MTV News Friday that Obama's recent speech on race was the deciding factor for his decision.

"I heard Obama speak," he said. "He hit me with that he-just-got-done-watching-'Malcolm X,' and I swear to God, I'm like, 'Yo, Obama!'

"I'm Obama to the end now, baby!"

But the musician also admitted he's lost interest in the protracted Democratic race, and may not support either candidate.

"To be honest, I haven't been following that anymore. I lost my interest," he said. "I listened to some of the debates and things that they were saying, and I just got lost in everything that was going on…Don't look for my vote, for me to determine nothing on that. Just say, '50 Cent, he don't know, so don't ask Fiddy.'

He also said he didn't think the country is ready for a black president.

"I just think there's people that might not be ready for an African-American president," he said. "It'll be an issue, believe it or not."

"You've got to be conscious of racism, period," he continued. "And it's still there. We don't deal with it as often as my grandparents did. My grandparents grew up in South Carolina, so they experienced the heart of that."

You know I really don't think this is going to effect either of their campaigns at all.

[Thefremen]

You know I really don't think this is going to effect either of their campaigns at all.

Obviously, Hillary will have DMX back her and then a rap rivalry will begin. Kind of like west-coast/east-coast.

[Demontestament]

Obviously, Hillary will have DMX back her and then a rap rivalry will begin. Kind of like west-coast/east-coast.

Leading to a Hillary/Obama rap battle?

[Thefremen]

Leading to a Hillary/Obama rap battle?

Yup. And like Eminem, Obama will take all of her ammo away straight away.

"Yeah I'm black. Sure my father's muslim. What the hell do I look like, your buck-toothed cousin?"

[beemoh]

Leading to a Hillary/Obama rap battle?

I would pay good money to see this happen.

[Demontestament]

I would pay good money to see this happen.

Since the race between them is so close I demand the rap battle to be at the Democratic National Convention. Winner gets the nomination.

[Thefremen]

Since the race between them is so close I demand the rap battle to be at the Democratic National Convention. Winner gets the nomination.

Either that or a break-dancing competition.

Hillary, you just got served!

[Thefremen]

http://www.mercurynews.com/news/ci_8730782?nclick_check=1

The bizarre aftermath of the San Francisco Zoo tiger attack took another strange twist this week. Two San Jose brothers injured in the attack filed a negligence and defamation claim against the city and zoo, and hours later, one of the brothers was in trouble with the law.

Paul Dhaliwal, 19, was arrested on suspicion of trying to swipe a pair of Nintendo Wii video game controllers from a Target store in San Leandro.

He probably planned to strangle his balls with the wiimote strap and then claim Target was neglegent in keeping him from stealing them.

[Crowskie]

http://www.metro.co.uk/weird/article.html?in_article_id=130090&in_page_id=2

Police in Ohio say that a married father of three has confessed to repeatedly having sex with his patio picnic table.

News report: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MbY0j02cNqY

[Tollwutig]

Macbook hacked withing 2 mins (http://news.yahoo.com/s/nf/20080331/bs_nf/59043;_ylt=Ai0jurZTnsv9ri8fH9jwz60jtBAF)

Last week saw the MacBook Air hacked through a Safari browser at the CanSecWest security conference. But before the week ended, Microsoft's Vista Ultimate also fell victim to hackers in the Pwn to Own challenge.

CanSecWest organizers offered a Fujitsu U810 laptop running Vista Ultimate SP1 to any security researcher who could find a way to breach security and gain access to the contents of system files using a previously undisclosed zero-day attack.

Shane Macaulay from Security Objectives won the laptop by exploiting an Adobe Flash zero-day vulnerability. The vulnerability was disclosed to Adobe, which is reportedly working on the issue. No other information is available about the Adobe flaw. Macaulay also won a $5,000 cash prize.

At the end of the last day of the three-day hacker challenge, which was sponsored by 3Com's TippingPoint, only the Sony VAIO laptop running Ubuntu (Linux) was left standing.

Shifting Rules

The first day of the contest, hackers were only allowed to hack into the computers over a network. No one was able to claim the prizes. On the second day, the rules changed. Contestants were allowed to use the machines to visit Web sites and open e-mail messages.

That rule change made it possible for Charlie Miller, a researcher at Independent Security Evaluators, to hack the MacBook Air using the Safari browser within two minutes.

But the Vista and Ubuntu laptops seemingly remained airtight. On the third day of the contest, the judges again broadened the rules, opening up the scope beyond just default installed applications on those laptops to any popular third-party application, such as Adobe's Acrobat Reader, the Firefox browser, and voice-over-IP program Skype.

Macaulay installed Adobe Flash on the laptops and proceeded to compromise the system. Macaulay had some help from Security Objectives colleague Derek Callaway and independent researcher Alexander Sotirov.

Means Justifies the End

Contests such as this tend to be high profile and gain a great deal of attention, but people need to realize that similar vulnerabilities are discovered every day and many stay hidden in the underground where they are used by attackers for some time before they're patched, according to Michael Sutton, director of security research at Safe Channel and a former director at VeriSign iDefense.

"Third-party researchers deserve to be rewarded for the considerable work that goes into uncovering vulnerabilities, so long as they handle the issues responsibly and report them to the appropriate parties to ensure that patches are created and distributed," Sutton said. "In this case, the contest does just that, so the end justifies the means."

Client-side vulnerabilities like the ones exploited in the hacking contest are an increasingly popular attack vector. It's easy to protect a single server that's guarded by a well-designed fortress of controls, Sutton explained, but it's a nightmare to secure thousands of client-side applications under the control of nonsecurity-savvy end users.

So much for Apple's invulnerability the Macbook Air fell first.

[MUTANT SPUD]

BRANDISHING "the sword of Islam", a Palestinian boy stabbed US President George W. Bush to death in a new puppet show for achildren aired by Hamas-owned television in the Gaza Strip.
http://www.news.com.au/story/0,23599,23468344-23109,00.html
Gee that's tasteful, why doesn't Basil Brush do stuff like that..and I worry about my kids being corrupted by Neighbours.
Last year, al-Aqsa television aired a programme starring a Mickey Mouse clone, Farfur, who urged children to fight Israel in the name of Islam. Farfur was killed off, on-air, by an actor posing as an Israeli security agent. ROFLMAOOOO!!!!

[Twin-Skies]

.
http://www.news.com.au/story/0,23599,23468344-23109,00.html
Gee that's tasteful, why doesn't Basil Brush do stuff like that..and I worry about my kids being corrupted by Neighbours.
ROFLMAOOOO!!!!

You ain't really laughing until you see the Jon Stewart skit on this whole thing.

http://www.thedailyshow.com/video/index.jhtml?videoId=90268&title=farfour-2007-2007

[BlackIce, British Commie]

http://www.iht.com/articles/2008/03/31/europe/kiev.php

President George W. Bush will be battling this week at the NATO summit meeting in Romania against Russia's opposition to eventual alliance membership for Ukraine and Georgia. And he will be pressing for greater help in Afghanistan from allies who are weary of the war there and inclined, in some cases, to put off tough decisions in hopes that the next American president will be more flexible.

Again, this article is safe for work. Unless you happen to work at the Kremlin.

[MUTANT SPUD]

You ain't really laughing until you see the Jon Stewart skit on this whole thing.

http://www.thedailyshow.com/video/index.jhtml?videoId=90268&title=farfour-2007-2007 Yes now I am laughing.

[BlackIce, British Commie]

http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/comment/faith/article3662450.ece

A prominent evangelical member of the Church of England’s General Synod has called for a ban on the building of any more mosques in Britain.

Oh dear. This is not going to be pleasant.

Alison Ruoff also claimed that Sharia law is inevitable in this country if mosques continue to be built here.

Build more Churches then. Or, better yet, destroy all Religious buildings and replace them with Universities and Council Houses.

However, if, in some inconceivable catastrophy Sharia Law is declared, I will start riots. I am not having that **** here under any circumstances.

[Grahamr]

http://www.iht.com/articles/2008/03/31/europe/kiev.php



Again, this article is safe for work. Unless you happen to work at the Kremlin.

What does he hope to gain from this other then humiliation and failure? While I want there to be more allies in Afghanistan, It seems that between the Vatican-sized embassy, the 14 bases that Haliburton is building, and this N.A.T.O college that's just been proposed, Bush literally wants to turn Iraq into a U.S state.

Oh, and on the story about Mosques in Britian, I think that British Muslims are out of their minds...the cool thing is, U.S Muslims are just fine...

[BlackIce, British Commie]

What does he hope to gain from this other then humiliation and failure? While I want there to be more allies in Afghanistan, It seems that between the Vatican-sized embassy, the 14 bases that Haliburton is building, and this N.A.T.O college that's just been proposed, Bush literally wants to turn Iraq into a U.S state.

That's an Embassy? Bloody Hell, I thought it was a front for concealing Nuclear Weapons.

[KN]

That's an Embassy? Bloody Hell, I thought it was a front for concealing Nuclear Weapons.

Yeah, US embassies tend to look like that. The old one in the Hague was the most heavily fortified building in the city. It even had a tank parked there.

Remember that this is also the city where our government is seated.

[Ace_ofspade]

Leading to a Hillary/Obama rap battle?

http://www.thepaincomics.com/weekly080305.htm

[Thefremen]

http://www.thepaincomics.com/weekly080305.htm

http://www.thepaincomics.com/weekly080220.htm

best comic ever.

[MUTANT SPUD]

http://news.teamxbox.com/xbox/16095/Postals-Cat-Silencer-Enters-US-Armys-Arsenal/
http://www.abc.net.au/tv/goodgame/stories/s2203168.htm
Feeble April fools joke from Teamxbox and a pretty well executed one from good game.

[BlackIce, British Commie]

Yeah, US embassies tend to look like that. The old one in the Hague was the most heavily fortified building in the city. It even had a tank parked there.

Remember that this is also the city where our government is seated.

Yes, I know your capital isn't Amsterdam.

[Mark of Cain]

Police: Teen Gives Birth At School, Kills Baby In Toilet
BAYTOWN, Texas -- A 14-year-old gave birth to a near full-term baby in a bathroom at a junior high school and tried to flush it down the toilet, police told KPRC Local 2.
Baytown police said the student delivered the child at Cedar Bayou Junior High School, located at 2600 Elvinta, on Wednesday morning.
The baby was born alive, investigators said. Students told police that they heard the baby crying.
Detectives said the baby died when the mother tried several times to flush the newborn down the toilet.
The case is being treated as a homicide, detectives said.
http://www.click2houston.com/news/15773665/detail.html

[BlackIce, British Commie]

http://www.click2houston.com/news/15773665/detail.html

****ing Hell.

[Demontestament]

http://www.click2houston.com/news/15773665/detail.html

I call for caining. Not because she gave birth to the kid in a bathroom but the fact that she tried to ****ing flush it. Caining followed by the removal of reproductive organs and then more Caining.

[Pelor]

Okay, you misspelled "caning" like three times in two sentences.

[Hannah]

http://www.click2houston.com/news/15773665/detail.html

Ye gods, is it that hard to get an abortion?

[Demontestament]

Okay, you misspelled "caning" like three times in two sentences.

The sad thing is that it was corrected that way by my work computers spell check.

Ye gods, is it that hard to get an abortion?

More than likely she was one of those idiots who didn't want their family to know they had sex because they would think she was a whore.

[Hannah]

The sad thing is that it was corrected that way by my work computers spell check.



More than likely she was one of those idiots who didn't want their family to know they had sex because they would think she was a whore.

Well, they'd probably be right :p

[Ace_ofspade]

...She thought the baby would fit?

[Twin-Skies]

Survey: Florida Teens Believe Drinking Bleach Will Prevent HIV (http://www.local6.com/news/15773787/detail.html)


A recent survey that found some Florida teens believe drinking a cap of bleach will prevent HIV and a shot of Mountain Dew will stop pregnancy has prompted lawmakers to push for an overhaul of sex education in the state.

The survey showed that Florida teens also believe that smoking marijuana will prevent a person from getting pregnant.

State lawmakers said the myths are spreading because of Florida's abstinence-only sex education, Local 6 reported.

They are proposing a bill that would require a more comprehensive approach, the report said.

It would still require teaching abstinence but students would also learn about condoms and other methods of birth control and disease prevention.

The bill just passed its first vote in a committee, Local 6 reported.

For once, I'm all for government intervention here.

[KN]

Survey: Florida Teens Believe Drinking Bleach Will Prevent HIV (http://www.local6.com/news/15773787/detail.html)



For once, I'm all for government intervention here.

Oh my god this is the best thing ever. We must encourage this belief.

[Demontestament]

Survey: Florida Teens Believe Drinking Bleach Will Prevent HIV (http://www.local6.com/news/15773787/detail.html)



For once, I'm all for government intervention here.

I can't stop laughing at this. These ideas are about as retarded as the one in Africa that says if you **** a virgin your AIDS will be cured. What the hell is wrong with Florida? Every day I hear about more and more stupid **** people do down there, is there something in the water?

[BlackIce, British Commie]

I can't stop laughing at this. These ideas are about as retarded as the one in Africa that says if you **** a virgin your AIDS will be cured. What the hell is wrong with Florida? Every day I hear about more and more stupid **** people do down there, is there something in the water?

It's been that way ever since Jeb pissed in it.

[weatherlight]

Survey: Florida Teens Believe Drinking Bleach Will Prevent HIV (http://www.local6.com/news/15773787/detail.html)



For once, I'm all for government intervention here.
I would like to see the statistics from the survey along with what the questions looked like, because that is just plain out retarded. however I do know a number of people who would answer those incorrectly like that for ****s and giggles.

[Demontestament]

I would like to see the statistics from the survey along with what the questions looked like, because that is just plain out retarded. however I do know a number of people who would answer those incorrectly like that for ****s and giggles.

A recent survey that found some Florida teens believe...

I wouldn't question it, teenagers are retarded. Add living in Florida to the equation and you have a level 5 retard outbreak on your hands.

[BlackIce, British Commie]

I wouldn't question it, teenagers are retarded. Add living in Florida to the equation and you have a level 5 retard outbreak on your hands.

M60's for every surviving man, woman and child aren't enough, are they?

[Demontestament]

M60's for every surviving man, woman and child aren't enough, are they?

No they are not. Once a level 5 outbreak has occurred only a 100% area purging will be enough.

[BlackIce, British Commie]

No they are not. Once a level 5 outbreak has occurred only a 100% area purging will be enough.

I'm thinking.. Dresden.

[nightwng2000]

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/23905909/


Police say the plot at Center Elementary School began because the children, ages 8 to 10, were apparently angry after the teacher disciplined one of the students for standing on a chair.

Students brought a crystal paperweight, a steak knife with a broken handle, steel handcuffs and other items as part of last week's plot, police said Tuesday. They said nine students were involved, but prosecutors are seeking juvenile charges against only three of them.



Police said the plot had been organized enough that some students were assigned specific roles such as covering classroom windows and cleaning up any mess.


I saw this article and the ages of the kids and how many and my mind zipped right over to the image from this movie:

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0114852/

No, really, that's some creepy stuff.

[BlackIce, British Commie]

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/23933157/

A Serb farmer used a grinding machine to cut in half his farm tools and machines to comply with a court ruling that he must share all his property with his ex-wife, local media reported on Thursday.

Just cut her in half. Saves time.

[weatherlight]

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/23933157/



Just cut her in half. Saves time.
Way to go man. Thats the way to get back at her.

[Thefremen]

I can't stop laughing at this. These ideas are about as retarded as the one in Africa that says if you **** a virgin your AIDS will be cured. What the hell is wrong with Florida? Every day I hear about more and more stupid **** people do down there, is there something in the water?

The cosmos is expanding every second, every day,
but their minds are shrinking as they close their eyes and pray.
They call their bull**** science like the word could give them cred,
if them bitches be scientists then cap me in the head....
I'm a disciple of science
I know the universe is compliance with natural laws,
but many place reliance on the psuedo-science of quacks and
morons and fools because,
their educations deficient,
they put faith in omniscient,
make believe beings who control their fate,
but the Hawk aint with it, dig it,
their Holy writ aint the least bit legit,
its a bunch of bull****.

Wise words indeed.

[beemoh]

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/health/7326839.stm

I think this is the news we all wanted to hear. Caffeine's good for us!

[BlackIce, British Commie]

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/health/7326839.stm

I think this is the news we all wanted to hear. Caffeine's good for us!

*Massive Cheer Erupts From France*

Oh dear, they haven't been this uppity since Napoleon was alive.

[BlackIce, British Commie]

http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/news/uk/crime/article3683968.ece

The sister and mother of Craig Meehan, the boyfriend of Shannon Matthews' mother, have been arrested by police investigating her abduction, Times Online has learnt.

How cute, she help kidnapp her daughter.. Prepare the firing squad.

[Pelor]

Okay, now here's something you've got to read:

Do Hamburgers Cause Crime? (http://freakonomics.blogs.nytimes.com/2008/04/03/do-hamburgers-cause-crime/)

No quote. You've got to read it in its entirety.

[BlackIce, British Commie]

Okay, now here's something you've got to read:

Do Hamburgers Cause Crime? (http://freakonomics.blogs.nytimes.com/2008/04/03/do-hamburgers-cause-crime/)

No quote. You've got to read it in its entirety.

Alright then..

[MUTANT SPUD]

http://www.news.com.au/story/0,23599,23488123-1702,00.html?from=public_rssA VIOLENT row over a giant rat led to the killing of two Mai Mai militia members in the Democratic Republic of Congo's Nord-Kivu province, Radio Okapi reports. Wow that's quite a rat! Huge, delicious and it can detect land mines..I wonder what else it can do?

[MUTANT SPUD]

Okay, now here's something you've got to read:

Do Hamburgers Cause Crime? (http://freakonomics.blogs.nytimes.com/2008/04/03/do-hamburgers-cause-crime/)

No quote. You've got to read it in its entirety. I used to work in an abbatoir/smallgoods factory on school holidays and I can attest to the fact that slaughtermen are weird, don't know about violent but it kind of does a person's head in after a while I think. There was a separate production line for making fertiliser out of any pigs who came of the truck sick or dead, it involved what amounted to a giant shredder and the sickos used to lean over the guard rails so they could watch the carcasses get smashed up. Nobody was supposed to go into the killing room if they were slaughtering but people used to stand outside the door and have a smoke and watch.It was a gross job altogether.

[KN]

Goodnight sweet prince (http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/entertainment/7332960.stm)

Charlton Heston, who won a best actor Oscar for his starring role in the epic Ben-Hur, has died aged 84, a spokesman for his family has said.

Heston died on Saturday at his home in Beverly Hills. His wife Lydia, whom he married in 1944, was at his side.

[Pelor]

Goodnight sweet prince (http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/entertainment/7332960.stm)

I guess we can finally pry that gun away from him.

[Demontestament]

I guess we can finally pry that gun away from him.

That is the same thing I said when I heard the news. Well that and "Did he drop any loot?"

[MUTANT SPUD]

I almost felt sorry for him when Michael Moore ambushed him at his house in Bowling for Columbine..almost.

[KN]

I almost felt sorry for him when Michael Moore ambushed him at his house in Bowling for Columbine..almost.

Fun activity: look closely at Heston's surroundings in that scene. There's a clock that appears to be affected by spacial anomalies.

Or could it be....

[Demontestament]

I almost felt sorry for him when Michael Moore ambushed him at his house in Bowling for Columbine..almost.

I was hoping for Heston to snap and shoot Michale Moore in the face.